IDidItMyWay

Being a best man at a wedding has a ton of fucking perks, firstly there is the possibility of banging one of the brides maids, being the centre of attention without anyone caring how you behave and best of all being you get to organise the bucks party.

Well for one Aussie guy, a dream it was not as he is now suing the stripper for rape. Apparently while the second stripper of the evening while naked with a strap on dick was performing her act on the best man. He was on all fours with his arse hanging out of his pants. While she was simulating a sexual position he thrusted backwards leading to the pink dildo entering his arse. Read more…

Every time you refuel your car you’re making some dude in some far away eastern country even more fucking rich. Seriously who the fuck are these guys and what the fuck do they look like?

Since pretty much no one in the western world knows the answers, one smart Arab looking Frenchman in Australia, has decided to play on this and just start telling everyone he is an Arab Price and has since managed to talk his way into using palaces, Ferraris, limousines and bodyguards while wining and dining beautiful women around the globe. Read more…

How long do you think it would take take a person to realize they had steered off course and  were now traveling  down a subway tunnel instead of the road? If your name is Max Kirsch you would have simply answered 200metres or more before I even finished that question.

This idiot from Germany who had just seen the new Harry Potter film was driving home when he took a wrong turn and ended up in underground train tunnel. Rather than fucking slam the brake on straight away and slam it into reverse while hoping no one saw your stupid arse go down the tunnel in the first place this idiot didn’t even realize. Read more…

If I was to ask a bunch of kids what the coolest way to die would be, I’m guessing most would say something like in a race car at full speed, in a shootout with cops while doing a heist, or perhaps drowning in a chocolate pool.

Well this week one lucky unlucky man came as close as possible to the third option. Vincent Smith Jr, 29 while working at Willy Wonka’s a chocolate factory stepped through an opening in the ground and fell into a vat filled with boiling chocolate that was in the process of being mixed.

How fucking bad/good would it be to die this way, apparently as soon as  he fell in he was screaming for help and you can just imagine chocolate was probably filling his mouth, so while yes he was in pain he probably was also having a sweet little snack.

But what is most concerning for me is where the fuck were the oompa loompa’s and why didn’t they try to help this guy? Were they on a break? Did he steal some candy prior to this? Also why was he even yelling, sure the vat would have been extremely hot but when I saw this very same thing happen in the fat kid in the movie he didn’t even scream at all.

Overall I guess the moral of this story is, don’t believe everything you see in a “kid’s” movie, unless it involves vampires and shit because everyone know ‘twilight’ is real… right?

What if you found out that your company was ‘restructuring’ and that a number of employees would be let go soon? Would you A) start looking for a new job? B) start kissing your bosses arse C) Hire a 6 Colombian hit man to kill your boss before he has the chance to fire you?

Well apparently if you’re Spanish you probably would have answered ‘C’ like this idiot.

Spanish police have arrested a man whom they suspect hired contract killers to murder his boss in a desperate bid to avoid being laid off

What a fucking idiot!! Did he honestly believe this would work? Did he honest think that all the ‘restructuring’ plans were ONLY in the bosses fucking head?

Besides the above, why go to the fucking extreme length of hiring 6 hit men when it would seem he could have easier killed the guy himself and A) saved money B) possible not got caught as half the world wouldn’t have been ‘in’ on it.

As most Idiot of The Week winners, there is always someone or something that helps put them above the rest and this case was no different.

In fear of losing his job, the head of services, through his sister, contracted a team of six Colombians who planned and carried out the killing, El Pais reported.

So not only could this dickhead not kill his boss himself but he also couldn’t arrange it by himself. This really raises another important question of is his sister fucking nuts also!! Seriously if my brother or sister came to me with this plan and was like “Hey.. ummm do you think you could get maybe 5 or 6 Colombian hit man to kill my boss so he doesn’t fire me?” my first reaction would be to punch him/her for being a fucking retard.

I guess the only positive of the story is that the parents are probably proud of their kids working so well together, of plus the fact they will save money every Christmas now as they won’t need to buy them Christmas presents anymore.

Note: No the picture isn’t of the hit man but it would have been so much fucking awesome if it was