IDidItMyWay

A man in California has sold his 14 year old daughter for $16,000. How much of a fucking idiot is this guy, not only is $16,000 a steal for a 14 year old but its fucking inhuman in the times we live in. How this guy could have just put his hand out and taken the $16,000 and walked away without his daughter is insanity. The only thing more comical then thinking about how this guy’s brain manages to wipe his own arse after taking a shit is the thought of what he was thinking he will tell the wife when he gets home minus a daughter. I bet he would have been thinking all types of golden excuses for being daughterless; perhaps “a bright light came from up above and zapped her up, there was nothing I could do”. Or another golden one might be “she turned into a Bat and flew away”.

The arse kicking this man would have got (unless of course his wife is anything like him) would have been something to play the Benny Hill theme too.  But what separates this story from the hundreds that IDIMW readers from Iran and shit probably hear of everyday is the fact that after a week on no payment being received the man was left with no choice other than to go to the cops and explain the situation as he knew they would be sympathetic to him. This would be like a crack dealer getting robbed and crying to the cops about everything that was taken, in fact this guy is so dumb that if he was a crack dealer and got robbed he would try and claim the missing crack on insurance.

Fuck there really are some dumb mother fuckers out there…

Today I read a new story about an American family who beat the shit out of their son and swung him around in the air to ‘get rid of a demon’. Apparently the father originally purchased a statue which he believed was possessed by the devil so he go a budda to bury it. After this he start throwing all his shit over the balcony with the final straw being his 3 year old kid.

Why the fuck do religious people do such weird things? Like that fucking weird Silas in that Da Vinci Code movie with him whipping himself with a metal cilice as a form of corporal mortification. Serious what fucking god wants to see his/her people doing that shit. Or that other fucking idiot Osama and how he is using Religion as a motive to hate American (and Bush at the time). Did bush ever give a shit who Allah was? He probably didn’t even know what the fuck Allah was suppose to be. But it goes to show how promising people something that they can’t prove you can’t offer really works in getting them to do anything.

So this got me thinking of other people doing shitting things and wondering what must make them do it, Strippers, prostitutes do it for the money. Public rest room cleaners do it for the money. This you would say is logical as at least they know they are going to get the money. But when it comes to religious freaks just telling someone they may get something is as good as the real thing in the eyes. I mean c’mon those dickheads who flew the planes in 911, they gained absolutely nothing (that is unless they are still up stairs with all their promised virgins).

But on the other hand how fucking awesome would the world be if everyone in the world (except you of course) operated like this? When going to get some gas at the gas station you realise you don’t have any money so you tell the station clerk “if you give me it for free when you die you won’t have pimples anymore” and bam your gas was free. Or your caught stealing a car and the cop ask if you have anything to say, so you tell him he will get an endless supply of doughnuts when he dies if he forgets all about the situation.

Thinking shit like this now kind of makes me want to join a closed gate cult….

I’m currently in the market for a home and coincidentally Aaron Spelling or more to the truth Aaron Spellings family has put his crib up for grabs. Probably due to the current recession they are practically giving it away for a cool 150million. In saying that unfortunately on my current salary it’s a little out of my reach so then feeling a little down with my salary and how what I can afford compares to the spelling estate I thought the best way to cheer me up is to laugh at others expense.

So I went on google and typed in ‘homeless house’ and had mixed emotions with the results. On one hand I was smiling thinking how I can afford a house perhaps not a fucking mansion but at least a roof over my head. Then on the other hand I started thinking about how these people would love a fucking upside down box and probably getting sad because they can’t afford a spelling type mansion doesn’t even cross their minds. Stuff like racing to be the first to the bin after I have thrown shit in there because I dropped it on the ground or who can collect the most plastic bags before dark are their biggest concerns and challenges for the day. They must be fucking furious with birds when they get to the bin quicker!!

Conclusion: This has made me feel better; I’m now going to get myself a burger and beer Fuck Yeah!!

Every week now someone is selling their virginity online. As I write this someone, somewhere is probably thinking about selling their virginity and buying a new Prada bag with the money.

How stupid are these people? What if the highest bidder is some old bastard who has aids and wants to pass it on? So basically this ‘publicized’ virgin would be aids infected from the go and more than likely wouldn’t even dream about going to be tested as they would think ‘huh what are the odds?’.

What is there to gain out of selling your virginity also? How would you explain that to your future partner when they google your name and a local news story of your online auction comes up. This is a really big problem in Japan at the moment also, except not as publicized.  Young girls in Japan actually are doing this on a daily basis and for far less then these online virgin celebrity are getting through what is known as ‘Enjo kōsai’ in English ‘Compensated Dating’ where school girls arrange dates with men in exchange for money. In many cases the dates lead to a love hotel and the rest is history. These guys like the online idiots either don’t see the danger or simply ignore it.

Although it’s very very difficult for a parent to know that their kids are doing all this shit I swear if I found out my kid ever did I would fucking beat the shit out of the guys taking advantage of these fucked up situations.

Anyone wanting to know more about ‘Enjo kōsai’ I suggest watching the japanese movie Love & Pop or there is an interesting article explaining a school girls experience with compensated dating on timeasia.

While doing my usual cruise of the internet I came across this gem of a site Sexypeople-blog.com which basically is the exact opposite of what you think it is. Every day at least one new fucked up in the looks department side of things person is posted on the site.

This got me thinking back to my early school days and how I remember there was kids who picked their noses, kids shitting and pissing themselves, kids who looked like they just rolled out of a dump truck the list goes on. Back in the day these kids just scared the shit out of me so of course I never went near any of them; I instead chose to observe from a distance.

Now in hindsight I can see a clear similarity that connects all these kids, other than the fact they were all fucking disgusting, they were all fucking dumb and weird looking as well. So correct me if I’m wrong (but I know I’m not so don’t bother trying to) but all ugly kids are dumb with most of them being disgusting in some way. Was it their choice to be like this? Probably not so when they grow up and kill their even more retarded parents we should all cheer that there are less stupid people left on earth.

I swear when I have kids, if they turn out to be anything under a 9 (I may let an 8 slide) in the looks department I’m pushing that fucker back in and demanding a replacement immediately.